There is a banner on a house by campus that says "welcome to college dads. Thanks for dropping off your daughters!"
worst morning ever. completed my walk of shame home to find my parents, grandma, and priest had come down to surprise me on my birthday. now i'm in the car with them to go get my car from the bar.
just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
I can't go out tonight I need to save my money for important things.....like rogaine and ecstasy.
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
so exactly how many freshman chicks did i tell to call me "the tripod"?
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
Guy next to me at the plasma center is high and watching porn on his itouch. I am wayy to hung over for this level of poor.
he went up stairs with nothing on but calvin klein's and an eskimo hat, said hi to her dad, got a doughnut, and left like it was an everyday thing
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
And I mean really who loses their phone in a tree
Everyone should just give me a copy of their keys. I take your dog out and I bring beer.
I think it's important to not involve Bar Food in any near future decisions.
you were walking down the sidewalk and just puked. didnt even stop or slow down and just kept going. i was so impressed i didnt even tell anyone you threw up on passing peoples shoes.
Randomize
