That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
i just overheard my mom tell my dad he should drink less so he could hit the right hole
I just found 3 condoms in my math textbook... in the probability section... Under dependent and independent events...
I had a party to get rid of booze. Woke up with even more. Will do this till I can open a liquor store
wait one more day. tuesday is my official "i hit on you and/or we hooked up this weekend" friend request day.
Everyone is sleeping and i'm sittin here in my iron man mask, watchin chelsea lately and tryin to figure out how to smoke through it.
6 beers and it feels like I've been drinking water... Daiquiri time
Who the fuck was that guy he kept pulling his dick out walking up to people trying to hand it to people and saying go ahead open the door like it was a door knob
Tell her to buy some booze and drink away her sorrows like an adult.
This guy punched out a light, puked in the sink, stole the mailbox, then tried to tell ME that I had to leave the party... Then his dog shit on the floor.
I plan on having so much gay sex in our house while you gone.
maybe if I avoid him long enough we could skip the talking part of "we need to talk"
I had to break it to her that she was not in fact behind the bushes when she peed on the church last night
Quit bitching. I brought you a muffin.
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