His second form of ID was an emergency room wristband from an hour ago. What the fuck is going on right now
Haha yeah he had an allergic reaction to the alcohol earlier. He thinks that if he only drinks vodka he will be ok...
instead of telling him i dont hook up with closet frat guys, i gave him his "straight' fraternity brothers number... pike house will be interesting tonight
I vomitted in the hotel where they film gossip girl last night. Everywhere.
She was the most uninteresting drunk I've met
Wednesdays are like the thursdays of tuesdays... Drink time
Pretty sure i didnt get thrown out cause why dont i have more bloody areas
It's not that drunk me is smarter; it's that sober me is secretly playing for the other team.
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
I am currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
My mouth feels like it's at the dentist but my body feels like it's at the strip club.
It was big, black, and had a smiley face tattooed on it. It was the perfect penis.
The Vicodin is in the strawberries.
Aka I'm headed to the liquor store because I don't know how to handle my emotions.
Randomize
