Why don't I have your new number? And who have I been texting?
i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
He can't get past my hymen. At least that's what he said it feels like.
Ok I can't be your drugdealer AND booty call AND friend. It just doesn't work that way
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
Was almost hungover and got scared, skipped hungover, back to hammered. Fuck real life
Mom looked at me, frowned, and said "it makes me sad to see you drink before noon.." So i told her if she doesn't like it she needs to stop waking me up before noon.
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
I need to stop acting like a drunk bitch. People are going to get the right idea about me...
HahahahahaHAHAHAHAHAHAHA MY LIFE IS A CAUTIONARY TALE
But seriously, I love you and you are a good person and I'll get you some ecstasy
cake and sex. what better combination is there.
We fucked for 9 months, but he didn't want anything serious. So, I got rid of him and went on a date with a guy last night that looks like Kylo Ren. Who's really winning here?
Not sure how my purse ended up in the bushes last night... Or why there was a noodle strainer in the toilet.
she passed out standing next to the car. her head hit the door so hard the alarm went off. she instantly snapped out of it and started sprinting away
Randomize
