Idk if this white stuff in my shower is conditioner or... something else?
I cant. I'm trying to smell my vagina.
One of my students just said I have "big mommy parts". Even third graders know that my tits are too big. God I love em.
If I have to go to the hospital can we stop by the liquor store on the way?
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
Will you please bring me a line of coke at work without asking questions?
The bellhop gave us weed in our keycard envelop. We went down to tip him and he apparently never gets that so he just gave us more weed. Kentucky is strange
Sorry there's no emoticon for I got my period all over a guy's bed so I had to improvise. There isn't even a bed one
as he was fingering me, all I was thinking about was how lucky his girlfriend is...
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
Not now. Out of camp chairs. Carving a new one with a chainsaw. Mushrooms are starting to kick and I gotta get this done NOW.
Things were going really well until his cousin showed up. She told him I look kind of like his mom, which started a ten-minute debate on my and his mother's specific features, and ultimately, who is prettier. Guess who my date picked.
All i remember is looking at the bottle vodka that I was drinking and wondering how it was suddenly empty.
That may have had to do with you chugging it
I just sold Adderall to a priest, im not quite sure how I feel about this situation
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