k, so I just picked a four leaf clover, then saw my dads penis. Lucky? I think not.
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
my feelings for you are synonymous with those of a grizzly bear and salmon. i don't want to nom on you; but i need you to survive
you woke me up in the middle of the night to tell me you were taking off your pants and it was not an invitation.
Sorry I tried to blow your roommate in your room. I felt more at home there.
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
i left the icescrapper in his bathroom. i dont remember taking it there, but i remember brushing his hair with it.
I always have trouble explaining my life decisions to people over the age of 30.
I believe I convinced two girls to makeout for freedom last night Hahaha
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
Must say, as a couple, she and I are thrilled that our pretend lesbianism has paid off.
You yelled to anyone that tried to help you "I have a burrito, what else could a girl want?"
Yes but I said "let's get a dog" not a drunk human so some rules will be established this evening
I really don’t want to have kids.
I thought we agreed we were done with dirty talk for the day
Someone broke into my car last night. Didn't take anything, even left the beer in my backseat. They need to get their priorities straight, obviously.
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