I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
im holly from the hills drunk
dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
Im blowing my nose and the only thing coming out is beer
I didn't have the heart to tell him that the reason my vagina was so "prelubricated" was because I had just had another gentleman caller an hour earlier. So, when he commented about how turned on I appeared, I just went with it.
But really- as the voice of your vagina I am BEGGING you to do it. If not for yourself than for your poor innocent puss
I think it's time for a new pick up line. So far my " hey you want to go back to my place, order a pizza and fuck?" Has set me at an all time low downtown 0/4
I say "glasses of whiskey" like I didn't chug it out of the bottle
Do you know why I woke up with a half peeled lemon in my purse with a post-it that said "eat me" on it?
At least I got steroids and a baguette out of the deal
The cat hopped on my bed and watched me masturbate naked with a vibrator. I've never felt more sorry in my entire life
I stared at his dick and then told him to get on his knees
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