I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
I wish I could still say I don't know that you taste like bad ice cream.
so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
call me tomorrow and ask me about coke-whore stripper. It hasnt happened yet, but im sure it will be plenty disappointing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
Can you imagine it being physically possible any other way unless the cows are unnaturally flexible
she gave me a handjob in the middle of the night and my stomach growled so she walked out totally naked and came back 5 minutes later with two sandwiches. who the fuck says getting married is awful?
Chasing shots with sriracha-covered mini toast was, in retrospect, not the best idea.
Why can't I hire someone to teach me how to be a decent human being?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
I always thought The Big Bang Theory wasa terrible show but that was before it came with blowjobs and pizza.
I really shouldn't have to tell you to stop banging your lightsaber on everything while we are in college.
Ugh. He got her for secret santa. Idk what to get. Idk what she's into.
... other people's boyfriends.
what happened to you last night?
I dunno man, i pissed in a urinal, sent you a picture of my vagina and woke up with 25 bar stamps on my arms.. you tell me
Taking a walk while tripping face during Halloween time was a bad idea. I started crying bc I was so scared and hide in the parks playground.
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