i can't believe i haven't brushed my teeth. and i just kissed my grandma. I'm going to hell.
So tired and we had a cokehead in the salon today making us bleach her whole head because she thought it would let her pass her drug test for custody of her kid
Oh.My.God.
What do you want? Don't say anything that would make me look like a pussy at the store.
True Life: I puke at bars and try to catch it in my hand...then walk away like it didn't happen
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wanted to google "huge banana" but I'm pretty sure all I'd get is dick pictures.
Hey I have to teach you how to run in heels before vegas
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
All he wants to do is masturbate while I sit there with my big toe up his ass that is not even the worst part of it.
scratched cornea got me an eyepatch and a blowjob from a girl with a thing for pirates
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's strippers and bear every where so ether you gave me the wrong address or this is the coolest birthday party thrown for a seven year old ever.
I know. he thinks we're 'meant to be'. No we're fucking not. God wouldn't give my soulmate a pencil dick.
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
so we just got back from swapping peoples patio furniture around to different patios. some people might like unexpected change. others might regret living on the ground floor.
Randomize