That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
lets grab drinks (in a friendly, not super awkward because ive eaten your ass kind of way) sometime soon
wow.
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
I'll tell these girls I'm like the pet adoption center...don't play with it if you're not taking it home.
Seriously wondering if smoking a bowl for lunch was a bad idea.
OR THE BEST. STAY TUNED.
I'm going to superglue stuart's hands into socker boppers
Think of where it's been though. That Dr. Suess book, "Oh the Places You'll go" was written for his penis.
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
Shit. I'm suppose to call the bank but I'm too high to talk numbers.
Can you not touch my dick while I'm holding a gecko?
We had a One Night Stand 6 months ago but he just Facebook invited me to his wedding. Who the fuck does that.
Woke up with an e-cig stuck in my asshole. Explain.
She's still here. My penis can feel it.
Dude, I think she left with some dude like an hour ago
FOUND HER. I swear this thing is like a metal-detector
Heard about your divorce. Let me know if I can do anything for you or your penis ;-)
Randomize