it took everything i had not to yell out "your name means death in german!"
Hes far too high and trying to explain daylight savings time to me. Help?
So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
I learned his name tonight. This now makes him a real person. Obviously, I no longer want to sleep with him.
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
He picked me up from the airport wearing nothing but a trench coat and a bow on his dick
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
I found a half composed text to you this morning and all it said was HELP M. Is that how I ended up at the bottom of the stairwell in only a tee-shirt and one heel?
considering I never received the text I would go with 'yes'.
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
It's something you'd find in the room outside of Ben Carson's sex dungeon
We can only continue to use the "oh what's the difference between circumcised and uncircumcised" for a few more months before people will see through our lies
My ex is stopping by while he’s working tonight after delivering a pizza to fuck me, then going back to work at Pizza Hut. This is what my life has become.
My GF, FWB and Side piece are all booty calling me. I’m a victim of my sexual success
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