i passed out on the floor in my hallway and woke up with my dog licking himself 2 inches from my face. my first reaction? envy
I bet there is no greater pleasure in life than pistol whipping people.
Anal.
Is it a bad that I spent my 5 year anniversary with my husband texting my ex boyfriend?
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up in what appears to be a taco bell graveyard in my bed.
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
im not sure if this headache is from the car accident or cocaine withdrawl
You are such a cockblock sometimes
You NEED a cockblock sometimes
I think I was using my hair to catch my vomit last night.
You were.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We where late for the party because we spent the last hour staring at a towl becase we thought it was a raccoon
Did you really get 12 corn dogs from the gas station last night?
you walked in, put on rap music and started chugging vodka
That was the night I passed out and someone threw chicken at me. SORRY I wasn't available to cockblock you from that Hispanic dude.
We're listening to drake in the middle of the woods and smoking two joints at once...my life is complete.
I swear, I make more use of my creative writing major with sexting than I do with anything else
Randomize