My girlfriend went down on me and as she did she hummed the theme from star wars and pretended my dick was a lightsaber...I'm buying the engagement ring tomorrow
Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
I'm so high that a hulu ad convinced me to go on healthybaby.com
Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Beer is about to convince me to do something really stupid.
I woke up in my girlfriends bed with another guy laying next to me. wtf.
The TA leading my study session just said "now get outta here. I need to get drunk before class"
I take your giggles as a yes to operation McLaxitives?
Where are you?! I require drunk, males and possibly crying. Vomiting is optional and/or optimal as is karaoke.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was relaxing until your penis crawled in my ear.
Come over. Bring cocaine. And my t shirt with the dolphin on it.
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
ugh i want to get waxed but I’m afraid. my vagina has had enough trauma this week, i don’t know if I can put her thru any more.
I drunkenly said, "That's my future father-in-law!" And everyone made an uncomfortable / disgusted face... including the aforementioined future father-in-law. Maybe I should start dating other people.
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
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