tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
There are a bunch of guys at the door looking for the guy you brought back to the condo...pretended not to speak English. You're welcome.
Hey, next time you have sex, flick his balls, and tell him "thats for getting spit in jennifer's eye and laughing about it."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You act as if I'm the first person to pee in the Taco Bell drive thru at 2 AM, I'm sure a lot worse things have happen in that drive thru than my urine.
It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed.
I'm just gonna get real fat and join the circus.
We had sex and then stood naked in his living room eating zucchini bread.
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude I think the cat just licked the coke plate
I asked him to get me another beer, and he started making muffins.
I really wish you were home bc youre the only friend I could ask to use an at home waxing kit on my vagina. I need you.
Who the fresh hell put 2 pillows a raincoat and a guitar on top of me to keep me warm last night
I didn't know it was possible and I don't know if I'll ever be able to do it again on my own but he literally fuck me sideways.
My husband found the cock ring I bought my FWB. I told him it was napkin holder and he believed me. And that’s why I need a side dick
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