he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
you said you wanted to feel how much my penis weighed for educational purposes
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
I thought it went well, but he just sent me a video of me sucking an icicle on the fire escape of his building with the caption "The ice got more than I did." Somehow I feel like I owe him a blowjob.
Is it bad that all my wine bottles have teeth marks in the cork?
I'm pretty sure at any given moment you could wring out my liver and get a couple of shots of jäger.
The cop was yelling at you as you layed on the sidewalk and you wouldn't take him seriously cause you thought it was some dude in a cop costume.
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
You got banned for life from a $30 a night motel. What are you doing with your life?
I WOULD NEVER MIX DICK AND MCDONALDS
Hey, you know that marble art statue thing in your bedroom? Hypothetically what would happen if a penis got stuck in it?
I'm in my math teacher's garage hiding right now because I fucked his son last night. It's fine
Excuse me I just made a hot pocket without burning down the house, I think i can do anything.
Just stalked the girl I hooked up with last night's boyfriend. He seems nice, I approve.
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