Kiss
Puke
We should be called the Road Head Warriors
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
saw a man at the beach in a red speedo. when he rolled over he unintentionally displayed a HUGE skid mark.
when a 14 year old is judging you, you know you've had too much to drink
I think my vagina is going to steal my keys and drive over there.
Hopefully she would park on my face.
omg i met someone at the bar who sells hair feathers. that are long. saved in my phone as "haiirs deather"
You and your vagina are hellbent on selfdestruction and bad decisions
Dude...can we put that on a tshirt? I will totally sport that shit.
Dude... I had a dream that I was getting high for the first time. I got to experience my weedginity again. It was glorious.
I think I'm destined to be the stoner version of one of those successful but emotionally unavailable characters Sandra Bullock always plays in movies
I just wanna get drunk and go sledding in my kayak
I saw seagulls fucking earlier today. What have you done with your life recently?
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
My brothers dog was hit by a car and died. They're really sad about it.
But they're having a baby! It's like a dog only 40 billion times worse!
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