I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
You are the only person I know who got away with wearing a turtleneck while getting laid. ONLY person.
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
Maybe it's just my body's way of telling me I don't need pinky toes. Like I'm the next evolutionary leap or something...
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
He could stay over, if you'd just ask.
Yeah. What am I supposed to say? "Oh, my couch is occupied, but my vagina's not"
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
In other news, I just sent her a video of me masturbating while driving in the rain, so I guess you could say I've mastered Snapchat
Can we make love to the Space Jam soundtrack?
He fed me Girl Scout cookies while I was still tied up...what did I do right?
Makes hanging out interesting when she lights you on fire just to roll ontop of you to 'put you out'.
Randomize
