She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
Words of wisdom-never eat a peanut-butter covered banana on a construction site ever again
We decided to play beer pong where the loser had to beer bong a pitcher of beer...people just started losing on purpose. It was a bad idea.
I'm challenging a 70 yr old alcoholic woman who is half my size tonight. Wish me luck
Just saw a guy walking down the street carrying a giant inflatable penis
Just arrived at our party
Haha! I've never met his girlfriend, so my main focus will be not saying,"you're the only person in this room that doesn't know what my vagina feels like."
I woke up naked except for someone else's socks. Im so proud
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
You came out of your room naked under your open robe with a mouth full of brownie on a stick and grabbed a fistful of fruit loops and shoved them into your already full mouth.
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
My vagina still hurts from yesterday. That's the last time I think riding a mop bucket is a good idea. Don't let me do that again
My eye was non-stop itchy for like an hour... I thought burying my face in your ass caught up with me
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
Are you ok? Who pooped in my office?
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