We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
shhh. i hid the ranch dip behind the rooster. don't tell anyone that way you can find it in the morning and it won't be all eaten.
wrong number but thanks
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
Is it too forward to say "stop being a good friend and start being a good fuck buddy"
I hope your fat roommate breaks the bunkbed and crushes you in your sleep
Cockoligist
Yes, one may refer to me as that.
I should make business cards.
You tired to make us "vodka tacos". Which was just you dipping pitas in vodka.
Any good?
Well. FUCK YA. But that's beside the point
They were swingers. Real swingers. Thought it was going to be awesome until some fat guy tried to put my dick in his mouth.
fucked a girl in the dry storage closet at work. knocked over a whole rack of tomato paste and pinto beans. and also i really hope my manager doesn't review this footage from the security camera
Watching Faye Reagan porn all weekend for St Patty's day. Nothing has ever seemed more appropriate.
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
Nothing like the judgmental looks you get in the bathroom when you still have last night's glowsticks on
Maybe why that's why I'm perpetually single... I can't find a guy with bigger balls than mine.
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
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