whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
The only pictures he has from one of the biggest football weekends is an album titled "I miss my dog" filled with tons of pictures of his dog and him. This relationship must end.
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He snuck out of bed at 9 am and came back with pizza and a bottle of wine. I think I'm in love!
Yep. Just threw myself a bachelorette party with my coworkers penis before I re-enter the holy order of monogomous relationships.
Midnight run for medical supplies ended several hours later with a lapdance to the Braveheart soundtrack.
Please tell me why your entire hallway smells like microwaved condoms.
New low: falling asleep with my face in the toilet only to be awoken when my hand slid down and touched the water. It's moments like these I wish I could forget.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Those mornings you wake up with a Barbie tramp stamp are the mornings that are the that are going to make me miss this place
He practically cut off his thumb and she offered him a tampon to stop the bleeding
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
Oddly enough I feel totally fine now. Clonazapam and red bull the breakfast of champions.
I love you. I would never turn you into a bear.
Fuck this pandemic. She grabbed the hand sanitizer instead of the hand lotion while giving me a hand job and now my dick is burning and scrotum are on fire
A hand job? Are you 12?
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