I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
dude my little brother busts into my room last night and yells did you know that grandma is hiding scrambled eggs between her legs
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
don't worry about the neighbors I'm like 99% sure all that snow covered a good portion of our vomit
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
I am at Brians in a pirate costume, what the hell am I thinking
I just slammed another champagne, swaggered over to her, pointed across the room at the 20 y/o lacrosse player and whispered loudly, "I brought that one for YOU." I'm getting a raise.
Brett got me a cake with a pic of me shitting
I never thought in a million years that I would have a threesome with my boss and his wife and yet here we are.
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion
Where are you guys?
Drunk
Randomize
