u on campus? she just peed the bed i need to go
My friend's 9-year-old son just informed me that for a cop station, you can't use a shotgun; you have to use a machine gun. Thank you, Grand Theft Auto, for single-handedly corrupting our youth.
will power is for people who don't want to get laid
I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
If Amber from Teen Mom can get a new boyfriend, so can I.
we found you outside the hotel room sleeping with a note next to you that said " we made sure you were comfortable, hope your friends come back soon"
He's afraid of heights. How do I know, you ask? Blowjob on his roof.
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
So you're at your daughter's volleyball game looking at dicks online? That's amazing.
No, I was picking her up from volleyball and sitting in my car looking at dicks.
Once again, your first date sounds like something of an epic. Odysseus' Quest for Fourth Base.
During my first week as an adjunct prof, I played a fiercely fought game of squash with a law student and we wound up having hot, sweaty, angry sex right on the floor of the court. She is either the best or worst thing to happen to my academic career. Will let you know.
My husband is waiting until son is napping and air humps as a seduction tactic. Pray for me.
Randomize
