I passed out in the cab. Woke up to the cabby yelling SIR SIR WE ARE AT THE TRAIN STATION!! SIRRRR!!
i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed
i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
We drove past his house blaring "Like a virgin" in the middle of the day. pretty sure he heard.
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
brushed my teeth nine times since getting home, still afraid there are pubes hiding in between my molars. fucking gummy bears
She took a six hour road trip with me so I could have revenge sex with my ex's brother. That is the definition of a best friend.
I'm pretty sure I asked his brother if he was gay while drunkenly falling to the ground.
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
I need a guy who can see in me what the lesbian community sees in me
What the fuck i just wanna eat my froot loops and sext in peace. Y'all motherfuckers gotta be loud as shit and break my concentration
On a side note. I slept with a stuffed giraffe last night. Found it in my bed when I came home and snuggled with it. Drunk me reverted to being 2
I left him naked in his bed. I did cover his junk with a blanket in case his roommate walked in later though. so I don't feel as bad about it.
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