can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
He didn't speak any English, but I think I caught the word turtle in there somewhere.
Why would he say turtle mid-fuck?
It was the gentlest way I could hit on a girl who just got hit by a car
well i had to explain to their mom why the kids i babysit for won't stop repeating the phrase "nice juicy guido"
I just imagined your drunkass eating Taco Bell in my living room. This is the Godmother of my potential child.
Heading to the gym, the one that guy said he goes to. Already checked online, his class is at 5. And no, this isn't too much after meeting him last night. Stop judging me,
We invented "Diesel Bombs." They're supposed to be a bomb, but they come in a 20+ oz. glass and have a blackout record of 6 wins and 0 losses. Undoubtedly going to be the next Muhammed Ali of the drinking world.
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
Oh shut up man. Once the police get involved its every man for themself.
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
Everyone is out there getting real jobs and I just realized I've been "washing" my clothes with fabric softener for two months.
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
Made it to my hair appointment on time, and got some dick. Today is already a great day
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