remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
I am telling you that nothing wakes you up like stomach acid exiting your nostrils at 10AM
Awkward moment #23: reasuring mom that the bf and I aren't having sex as seamen is running down my leg...
My mouth holds just enough water for my bong
I'm gonna give him birthday punches. On the dick. With my mouth.
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
I think this shark week should consist of getting drunk enough to actually go hunt sharks ourselves.
I mean, how am I going to build a relationship on trust if he finds out I roofied him?
She's got Mike in the bathroom. He's covered in meat.
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
She gave me a collar. When I asked what this was for she replied "I'm taming your dick"
His sisters are going to have a heyday finding all those condoms in their bunk beds.
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