I then asked the hardee's employee: mam, do you mind if i pay 75 cents in cash and then put the 1.13 on my debit card.
I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
can't come out tonight. went to the bar again last night and the bartender hugged and thanked me so much for my "generosity." I'm intrigued but terrified to see my credit card bill.
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
Dude. Some drunk chick just put an Aussie hat on me and was screaming at me in German. Her friends had to drag her away. Point being, I now have a cool hat.
You woke up, laughed, proceeded to throw up on me and then passed out again.
Jesus I should have learned from my first marriage not to get married again
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
I've never seen so much of my blood outside me. After the initial shock it was kind of cool.
Look, I tried but his dick tasted like disappointment.
do you know of a way I can die but like NOT die? like not being unconcious, just ascending to an astral plane for a few weeks or months in real world time so i can sort my issues out away from the rigors of life kinda deal, you know?
Every time I see this chick she's swimming naked at a pool party. That's gotta mean something right?
Dude it's unhealthy how much I love vagina in my face
Randomize