Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
im sober playing flip cup. its like cheating.
I sat on his lap and we shared a beer. I feel like that's an invitation to his dick.
I wish we could tell the moving van to wait at the strip club for a while.
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
during a bj, his alarm went off and he said "At the buzzer"
There are only families here. I'm at the bar alone double fisting drinks. You cannot get any more approachable than I am now.
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
yeah...that's gonna come up in court
Serious question: Should I volunteer to get tazered? My instincts say no but my wild side says yes.
Would you mind pretending to be lesbians just for like three emails?
He tried to tell me that he could handle his liquor better than "all the bitches in this town." AS HE THREW UP. ALL. OVER.
Some girl is sitting topless in the kitchen and having a Skype video chat with some guy. I already like it here.
Just in case you forgot, last night you came home drunk and pissed all over my laptop. You owe me a laptop.
Is offering to blow your HR rep considered an ethics violation?
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