something came early last nite... and lemme tell u it wasn't christmas...
on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..
who won?
THAT is your concern right now?
Whatever. We're stealing a penguin. Your not allowed near him... You did this to yourself.
how the hell did u puke all over the magazines... do u still want me to keep them
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
This guy either needs to stop touching me or buy me another drink.
You drunk dialed me and told me to jump out of my second story window so I could give you head. I almost considered it.
he was extremely fucked up- he thought my sports bra was his boxers. even when his leg wouldnt fit. at least whiskey dick wasnt a problem
Wtf man. I knew she was bad news. No sane person cares if you eat their raviolli.
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
His exact words were "Can I meet your vagina?" I kept wondering if he was going to try to shake hands with it...
Literally just inhaled three cinnamon rolls. Sara is staring. It was inhuman
So, no matter what happens today, hold on to this. At least you're not naked under your ex husband's trench coat being stopped by the police who also work with your ex husband. Long story. Actually, not a long story. That's it.
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
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