sober me hid the cigs from drunk me. sober me is a tricky bitch.
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
Ya I fucked her.. But now Melissa is gonna find out
Just tell her that in a man's never ending war between his heart and his dick... His heart never wins
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's alright she couldn't hear you. Her legs were over her ears
let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
Did you just reference Ludacris during my possible pregnancy scare of 2012?!
I'm glad I booty called you last night. It was nice to see you and talk, in between all the sex...
Well it was tamer than the 4th of july when I blew that guy I met walking home from the fireworks
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
You forget how awesome toilet paper is until you have to wipe your ass with a piece of notebook paper...
I can guarantee he will smoke me out and I won't feel bad about it because he gets to touch my butt.
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
i just sexted for my mom while she was driving, i have hit an all time low.
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
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