I would like to feed your fingertips to the wolverines.
We better get laid next semester cause I prayed hard
I even walked 30 feet with my eyes closed from two love rocks so that we get some cock
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
we seriously had to hang a plastic bag on his ears so he could throw up right into it.
Does saving a line for myself for the morning so I don't seem hungover at work count as responsibility?
Adult decisions.
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
Scary. I thought trees were a lie and that someone ha permanently stenciled them into my life. No joke.
I'm not mad at you for letting me use my air mattress as a toilet, i'm mad at you for letting me lay back down on it.
Just you wait I'll be crying and puking everywhere in no time
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
She's like a solid nine. Well maybe not a tomorrow morning nine, but she's a nine right now and trying to take me home.
Just bumped into my ex. Blowing a dude in the ladies' room at Disney World. I guess it really was her not me.
You weren't stupid you just made an ass of yourself. It's called a birthday party. That's code for night of regrets.
I got wing sauce on the baby and licked it off. If you were wondering how I'm doing.
Randomize
