The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
Didn't tell him I was on my period. Then had to surreptitiously remove some uterine lining from his cock.
I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
Just got thank you sex for shoveling the driveway. I cant wait for the next blizzard
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
i'm forwarding you the dirty picture of that fat girl that likes me sent . i feel like since youre my best friend you should puke in your mouth too .
He tried to stick it in and I asked him what he wanted to name our child and he quit.
so the good news is that i can't possibly burn my eyelashes off tonight at the bbq.
You said that "grilled cheese was much to complex" and started to throw the buttered bread at the wall while eating all the cheese.
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours
Nothing like snapchatring dick pics to a\nMarried woman while your girlfriend destroys Taco Bell in the next room. Almost caught, worth it. Got boobs back
I just want to have sex and eat dumplings. Is that so much to ask?
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
i just found a pair of your underwear stuffed behind my harry potter books...was that on purpose?
haha no, it was majik
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