Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
Just so you know, coffee creamer+water does not = milk.
im sitting in a tub with a sombrero on.. im just kind of confused.
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
Just got invited out of group to take shots after hearing her gay friend say "why would I give him my alcohol so you can suck his dick. It's going to be a good night
So not only did you shoot down my invitation and prob walked past my house but now ur excluding me from a wet t shirt contest which btw i totally would have won
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
just had Stella and stale goldfish for breakfast under the watchful eyes of an inflatable cactus and 5 llama pinatas. Cinco de mayo success!
He just stared me dead in the eye as he continued to beat off. Then said "you were going to catch me sooner or later".
One failed naked backward somersault off the bed and I realize - I either need to drink less or workout more. Perhaps both.
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
My cousin was arrested on a class b felony for selling meth out of the back door of McDonald's where he worked. Apparently it was the extra special sauce.
It was a career choice to be sure... Mistakes were made.
Our love of vodka is more proof than a maternity test
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
Randomize