Get your hand out of your ass!
how did you know my hand was in my ass? Guess where my other hand is..?
In your belly button
Sometimes i look at the biltmore estate and wonder just how small George Vanderbilt's penis was...
had a guy just try to take his underwear off in the middle of the bar w o taking his pants off. That kind of Sunday afternoon
Apparently my gaydar only works on americans. Frenchie capris has two topless chicks in our kitchen making him breakfast.
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
It was awful until we put her on a word ration. And she rationed her words accordingly. I love blondes.
it was like a congratulatory penis slap
i figured out i could get from the downstairs bar to the upstairs bar AND grab pizza by going through the kitchen. it was the greatest discovery of my life besides the flabongo.
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
Hey I was just wondering if you could go look for my teeth?
Ok despite the fact that both you and I love dick we could have a great marriage
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
You said you were going to start drinking less. Drinking 25 small airplane bottle shots do not count.
just the thought of you slurpin down noodles really rustles my jimmy
you suck at sexting
We stood outside the room listening to them have sex and making meow noises
That's not right, is it?
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