I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
just ask for directions from a guy with a penis drawn on his window
i just got the best bj of my life in the pastors office at church.. Youre right jesus really does love me.
At least you weren't that one girl in the bar that was letting everyone draw on her in sharpie. Worst decision I've ever witnessed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've banged too many servicemen's wives to still be considered an American.
Let me start this apology by saying I'm sorry that I bit your penis.
I recommend you throw your keys as far as you can in one direction, your phone as far as you can in the opposite direction, and hold on.
fun fact: in my eskimo family tree i am the only brunette
well... I just junk punched a carnie. Doesnt matter how, it still counts for my bucket list.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The shit I just took made me regret every life decision leading up to it.
I'm 99.9% sure the people upstairs are using walki-talkies to talk to each other across the room. Too high for this shit
I woke up without my clothes on covered up with a towel on the floor because for some reason I took a bath in my clothes at 2am.
He started french braiding my hair while I was blowing him. The question is not why, but how.
How's Vegas?
Woke up with a sculpture of my own head. Been trying to find Ashley for two days. so pretty not too bad.
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
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