i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
I'd just like to give a shout out to jesus and plan b for making this day possible.
dude, i woke up with a mini keg on my night stand. again. like wtf
its friday night, im aone in my apartment and eating 2 year expired canned fruit, naked. i'm not single or anything..
The words "me," "sober," and "new years eve" do not go together. Ever.
At first I was a little embarrassed for sharting, but then i realized it was a bachelor party, and I went balls to the wall
Not now. Out of camp chairs. Carving a new one with a chainsaw. Mushrooms are starting to kick and I gotta get this done NOW.
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
I just used the proceeds from selling my ex's engagement ring to fund my first date with another girl.
New life goal: fuck in the shopping cart
I ended up in th ER yelling my height weight and age
Awkward, walking to my bootycall's hotel room and run into my dad leaving his. Just nodded to each other and went on our ways
Randomize
