im pretty sure i tried to attack the vending machine last night
lol who won
well im in the hospital right now so u tell me
Not everyone can get ass. Some people are good at building rockets. You’re good at sleeping with many men. It’s an art.
i sneezed during and he said it felt like i gave birth to his dick...then asked me to do it again.
Tell me why I'm at Target and this entire Spanish family is crowding around the condoms questioning which ones they should get
I cannot for the life of me remember why I am holding this rabbit.
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
Lesson of the night: never take shots out of a bottle you found under a couch in a frat house. I have no idea where I am
No need to talk. Eventually, he'll either stop coming over, or decide that it's a relationship.
And if not?
...I keep getting free bourbon and great sex with no expectations. You really don't understand that there is no "down side," do you?
my dad pointed to my full beer and said drink up we're leaving now.
can you adopt me?
The front camera on the 5S is SO much better. This is great development for my international sexting.
I bought emergency contraception until I / we decide how to handle that. And target gave me a gift receipt for it. Awkward.
It's days like today, when my bra and underwear match, that make me feel like I'm getting my life together...
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
Being on probation is a nice change of pace. It's refreshing to wake up and know what I did last night.
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
Randomize
