HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
I wish we could tell the moving van to wait at the strip club for a while.
where did this taco bell managers name tag come from ?
You can duct tape yourself to me so we dont lose you and you dont have to celebrate your birthday alone
You can drink as much as you want but it's not gunna make her forehead any smaller
I was hoping it might at least fix her teeth
Sorry we couldn't "turn off the mirrors." How're you feeling today?
I was so high I told him we should rub faces and pretend to be wombats. He was surprisingly enthusiastic about it.
I'm putting my hangover kit in my car for the trip to work tomorrow morning. Dedication
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
HE PEED ON ME. THE MANAGER OF THE BAR.
So, I ran into Garrett last night in the laundry room.
Oh really? First post break-up run in. How'd it go? Awkward?
Um. We had sex on a washing machine.
I woke up in the bathtub with money shoved down my pants. I must've done something right.
I think the hamburger goblin stole my cigarettes. I left my purse behind her table and they're not in it now.
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