Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
she kept asking for a lobster dinner while she was crying. it was actually the most reasonable drunk chick request i've ever heard.
Hes wearing a shirt that says warning shitshow and i cant help but think his attorney made him wear it so ppl know the dangers.
Whatever happend to that lawsuit where he got sued for shittig in that fish tank
I'm bringing cupcakes to work today as an apology for my actions at the bar last night, my boss probably can't look at me the same ever again
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
Apparently getting a blow job in the mens room from the bar owners daughter will get you kicked out.
They should just send me home - I'm literally doing nothing but watching porn and listening to pandora.
I thought this guy walking back to the dorms with his black laundry bag was walking a black flamingo I'm not even kidding I had to take a break on a bench after that.
You're my favorite person
Girls at BYU need to learn how to handle a penis. I swear my date last night was trying to pull it off my body to use later.
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
I'm pretty sure the guy on the dance floor with crutches just smacked me in the butt with one. Do you think he's flirting?
There's a guy running dressed as a bunny toward your house.
You know it was a good night when visa fraud prevention services are calling
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
Randomize
