Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
Admitting I go to nursing school is my subtle way of saying, yes, I know every muscle in your penis and how to effectively use them.
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
Reached a new low. Drinking Wine from my thermos while on the stair master.
Hardest I think I've ever had to work for a shack. Whatevs. Still gonna get my way though. I'll start respecting myself on Monday
Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge.
I have a fever. Last thing I need to do tonight is be elbow deep in old lady pussy.
So....I just took a paddle fan on high speed to the side of the head while getting head...still finished the job, good thing I'm drunk and couldn't feel it.
Come to this bar
But I'm full of food.
MAKE ME FULL OF YOUR DICK
Pissing into the Grand Canyon is the single most liberating thing I've ever done in my entire life
Honestly I am too high to watch videos of you jerking off right now
My mom just asked me if I knew what Buzzfeed was. Then said she's watching the second Magic Mike for the bodies. Please help.
Oh. So it is a cult
Basically. But a nice cult. They eat muffins and talk about fundraising.
You ate all the burritos in sight....I cant take you to mexican restaurants anymore
Randomize
