After last night, I could never be a politician.
finally achieved: got laid in the religion section of borders. thought you should know.
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
His dick was poking my bladder. That big...
Sometimes I wish I could open my skin and just take a little peek at my liver. You know, just to see if it's rotten yet or still perfect looking.
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
I transported a midget tonight. He got beat up by another, midgetier midget. Is it bad that this is what makes me feel compassion after 15 years of being a paramedic?
Midgetier?
Smaller, yet meaner.
Am I the only one that feels like there are hundreds of tiny people having a rave and stomping and kicking around inside my head this morning?
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
You had the nerve to crowd surf to your own bedroom.. I guess watching Aladdin high was probably the best idea ever
Haha, I gave you the rest of the cash I had on me and you bought 3 shots for yourself and beer for everybody except me FUCKFACE.
Also I would love to pregame at your place if I weren't stuck at mine drinking laxatives
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
I'm fine. Heading home now...crying. Michael Bolton totally understands me!
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