He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
She highfived me after i yelled "I'm the clit-commander!" when i came. kevin smith fan and clearly a keeper
found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
Eventually evolution will just give us a better liver anyway, so our great great grandkids should THANK us for our binge drinking.
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
NEW RULE: NO INNAPROPRIATE CHOICES THAT INVOLVE GUNS. I LIKE IT. WRITE THAT DOWN.
I just want you to know that I hid the weed. Once you find another job, I'll tell you where it is. Happy Hunting, bro.
I put chex mix in your purse for when you get hungry while doing your walk of shame tomorrow!
When a bartender remarks "wow" on how quickly you've finished a drink... Is that good or bad?
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
Note to self; if you can light it on fire, you probs shouldn't drink it
TSA found the edibles
Fuck
Oh my god he just. Swiped them for explosives and handed them back to me
God bless California
Randomize
