remember that time i ran away from the bar and passed out in a street cot?
neither do i
I just saw a man with a full beard and frosted tips
there is no god
ill find time for any girl whos not afraid to grab my junk in front of 100 people
I'm watching the red sox through my neighbors window from my bathroom. We're winning btw.
I think it was the chocolate body paint and awesome blowjob that finally made us official.
WHY IS EVERY MAN IN THIS CITY GAY? IS IT SO BAD TO WANT TO BE TREATED LIKE A PIECE OF SHIT BY A REALLY HOT STRAIGHT MAN FOR A NIGHT?
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
Dude..this is the third year in a row me and him have fucked at a super bowl party..does that count as a tradition?
He's a Shit stain on my heart
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
My boobs keep hanging out of this shirt. I think thats the style I'm going for tonight
Guy in my class today said, "I'm pretty sure you think about beer 95% of the time."
he's trapped himself under a bed and is screaming at a robot dog to give him a blowjob
My toothbrush tastes like captain morgan
I'm jealous
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