I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
I love being friends with rich people. I get laid by association.
Besides Rainforest Cafe, there's nowhere i'd rather be intoxicated than here
You told me I was special while we were having sex and I asked why.
What did I say?
Don't ask me questions while I have an erection,
I'm having a flashback of telling a guy that he was beautiful and graceful like a unicorn while playing shuffleboard.
I have a scary feeling my mom might switch her goals from finding me a husband in 2012 to sending me to rehab
I love you. Happy valentines. Satin Patricks dayyyyyyyyyy. Alreadythrew up. Geeeeerait.
Sunrise bitch. You owe me waffles
i keep seeing little orange spots im starting to freak out
you tried mixing adderall in your visine last night..
I was stopped at a light on my way home and a priest threw holy water on my car. Seems fitting after last night.
I could drive to your house and kick you in the nuts right now....and not even stop for a burrito
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
STOP TRYING TO FUCK MY DAD
THE HOT GUY IS YOUR DAD?!?!?!?!???
If there was a category for "most likely to end up a serial killer" in your high school yearbook then I'm sure you would have won it
I NEED TO TAKE A FUCKING BREAK. MY VAGINA IS SMOKING.
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