Spotted: jayne dropping her cigarettes in a puddle...then picking them back up and putting them in her pocket. If i ever get that desperate, stop talking to me
It's just like soggy cereal, but cancerous
I wonder if you could grow some weed in a chia pet
You slept with a red coat way too close to independence day. It's just very unpatriotic.
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
God you people are gross. Come collect your unconscious friend.
Is it 3pm? Or am I losing my mind because it's pickled in vodka and diet coke?
All you need to know is that isn't jizz
I cannot describe the pre-ejaculative horrors thru the medium of text messaging
Thank god for federal credentials. Waaaaayyyy to hungover to go through airport security lines right now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They're playing house music in my dentists office again, wtf is wrong with these people. That's not the music you want to get a root canal to
I feel like the dump I just dropped is the most successful thing I've done so far today.
We were making fun of some people having sex on the beach, an hour later we were having sex on a golf course
Dude just walked up to me, gave me his number and said, if this number ever calls its my penis,better keep that one handy. I cant lie its the best pick up line ever, im calling his penis.
i had to win in rock paper scissors, get called a fat whore, and make two dudes get in a fight so we could call next game on the table and you make zero cups. thanks asshole.
I'm like a great zombie Jesus.
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