It's only slutty when someone else does it. It's okay if it's us though
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
I wonder if she thought to herself "I'm gonna sleep with that guy tonight" when she watched me puke on the bar at 3 in the afternoon?
Your philanthropic work just got me laid, thanks dad for naming me #2.
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
Package arrived for me from the gf while she's on vacation..under the bed bondage kit and new lingerie...my boner could drive to the airport
The problem with having a roommate is that you are forced to answer the age old question "Are you okay?"
We had sex on the bear rug. He said "you, me and the bear. This is bear-idise"
Halloween: the only night of the year wheee the more high I get, the more it compliments my makeup and outfit.
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
Just called the boss a "cunt baguette". To her face. This is why I can't drink with people from work. Know of anywhere that's hiring?
I'm way too sober and people are way too heterosexual
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
Randomize
