I would do things to you that would get us burned at the stake if we lived in a puritan village.
if I want to go home with a foreign boy, please feel free to let me go, sober me gives you permission to let drunken me do it
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
what is the protocol for being hungover enough to vomit in a potted plant during my botany lecture?
It's official drugs can't kill me
admittedly, it's a little weird getting relationship advice from the mother of a former one night stand. but she's a wise lady and she buys me drinks, so i'm ok with it.
I complimented him on his choice of carpeting while he was humping me.
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But I mean, have you ever just LOOKED at how majestic penises are? They are like ivory columns of pure wonder!
While having sex, a German accent isn't sexy.
"The More You Know"
Well. I think my red tank top is jinxed. this is now the second time it's gotten jizz on it.
there is another microwave in the elevator.
Mimosas make me so tired. I just ordered a huge thing of pasta and gonna eat it in my underwear like a bad bitch
Feel free to drag me back to reality at your convenience
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