Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
i guess its not very common for a paramedic to have to revive someone who was struck by a falling shampoo bottle while getting off from the bathtub faucet.
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
What's the best way to say, "it's too early in our relationship to leave me at your place alone"? Steal something?
After she cried and passed out at four in the morning, I had a very lovely, very drunken conversation with her mother while decorating a cake into the shape of a penis.
But you're the one who should be jamming foreign objects into my vaj instead of an old weird lady. I mean, it is your birthday....
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
He expects to fuck my tits but will ignore me in public.
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
the fact that i came three times was completely negated by the fact that he high-fived himself after.
I need to start a penis folder so I stop "accidentally" showing people my junk. On a side note- St. Pattys penis was a hit, four leaf clover and all.
The only thing about him that I appreciated was that he destroyed the bathroom at your birthday and missed singing to you. And we all knew.
They asked me my level of pain at the hospital and I told them I called my ex 6 times
What the fuck happened last night.... I woke up with a bowl half full of ravioli next to my head, reversed on my bed still fully clothed.....
Sextember may be over, but Cocktober is just beginning!!!
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