Just got my rental car in Iowa...gas is under 2 dollars in des moines...this is not a real state
Yeah, all the sudden I heard a loud "ding" and realized I had been passed out on the dorm elevator for about an hour....
some drunk guy just paid $3 for each cig that i picked up off the ground. the cigs that he threw on the ground. I might just follow him the rest of the night
$1 margaritas. This happy hour needs to end.
I pretended I didn't remember seeing him hookup with that freshman, and he pretended he didn't remember seeing me hookup with that old guy. We have a beautiful and unawkward friendship.
The only way to make beer can wizard staffs any better is to sew your own wizards robe and hat to go along with it. welcome to tuesday nights at my new apartment
It was an "I snuck in through the window at 5am with my underwear in my pocket" kind of night.
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
I tore the muscle in my left calf at the gym and still spent all evening in heels. UNSTOPPABLE!
We started off talking about nice cuddling and you turned it into fucking with a Santa hat on...
dont know how to tell my grandparents I woke up in a frat house in the wrong town and that's why I can't see them today
I just saw a girl drinking wine and walking her dog in footie pajamas and a mad hatter hat. First day of the new year and I think I'm in love.
I feel like you should put up a missed connections ad for this..
I came home braless and wearing a tail....
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
Omg I joined a choir last night...
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