similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
I told her at least we still had each other. That's when she started crying.
Im a photoshop master, i successfully reduced the size of the pupils of all the girls I made out last night with to prove they were not that drunk. So glad the camera goes home with me.
Do you think my parents will accept my drinking habits more if I told them I like to drink every night because I take good shits the next morning?
I full on slapped a girl with pizza. Like in the face with sauce splattered everywhere and grease with a hard slap to the face.
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
Last night in my drunkenness I bought hurricane supplies which included a jug of wine and a bouquet of flowers. Apparently I'm going to woo Irene.
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
Cute underage boy is in my house.
OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.
the people next to us at the red light cheered for you while you puked out the window...
Well. I mean as excuses for running late go, 'losing track of time in the bathhouse' has gotta be up there on the top ten.
There are no winners in a lube eating competition.
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
the girl who hid my weed when the cops came has a birthday coming up. i feel like i should get her something.
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
Randomize
