The guy dancing on me has three visible teeth. WHERE ARE YOU?
and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
This is the 4 year anniversary of the last time I shit my pants. Let's get drunk...
Is it sad that I find it completely normal that I just took batteries out of a vibrator to put them in a pencil sharpener so I could do homework?
I find this completely acceptable.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's a freaking stalker dude, it's like having some kind of cartoon animal just following around everywhere
On our way there. Drinking my beer out of a coffee pot. Cuz it's my bday
Does taking an old homeless guy to the strip club, buying him lap dances, and calling him pops all night count as a good deed???
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
there was 'chicken suit porn' in my search history.......also 'scuba diving porn'
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
Pretend you're in a taco. That always helps me sleep.
This summer has already been like the best summer ever. FREEDOM IS AWESOME. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND GOD BLESS THE SINGLE LIFE.
We just had an accidental Facebook titty pic scare.
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
OH DEAR GOD IT GOT IN MY MOUTH AGAIN HELP
Randomize