I mean I can't believe yesterday ended w/ your house getting firebombed. What an unexpected turn of events
We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fact: Telling a guy he has erectile dysfunction doesn't solve the problem.
she carries around a jar of peanut butter. "just in case".
look, i dont wanna be "that girl" but if someone offers me coke in exchange for sex, i cant say no.
She kept screaming "best case scenario"
I've had more sex in the two weeks since we broke up than I ever had in any two weeks we were together.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
BABIES FOR EVERYONE. I'd be like Oprah except with babies
My family will be here in an hour and I'm deciding between doing my makeup or saying fuck it and wearing what's left of last night's...
Just ate a gummy bear I found in my sheets. So yeah, 2013 is SO gonna be my year.
I just tried to order ice cream on my bagel. I think I should just call it
She said, I've heard about you, from girls you wouldn't even be interested in. What?
Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.
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