Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
Dude, I just scraped frozen vomit from my rooftop
I really wish I could say this is a new low for you
I just made doing the dishes into a drinking game. crafty, or pathetic?
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
She said she was jealous that i could wear headbands, then growled at the ground in shame..
I just found a 2 minute video on my phone of you throwing up in a fake plant.
im at work. we just had a random 14-year-old amish girl come in and gift us with cinnamon rolls as thanks for letting her use the bathroom. i dont even know.
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
it's pretty awkward texting you how much I want to suck your cock when I have my mom on speakerphone.
On my way
You're doing screenings before you set me up again- no child sized dicks allowed.
The first thing I did when I got to the apartment was masturbate on the couch
New rule. If he's too busy to put the "H" in "what" then I'm too busy to put his D in me.
Randomize
