We fucked twice, I went to the bathroom to freshen up, and came back to him playing "Your Body is A Wonderland" on his guitar naked in my bed.
Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
Are you scared? I basically plan on us looking like giant drunk skittles
I was going to text him and apologize but I didn't want him to think that meant I approved of him being my niece's booty call.
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
He ended our Skype call with, "I'm going to poop and then go play my ukulele in the park."
Lead with your genitals is the best advice I can give you.
If I could drive and get you Starbucks I would... But that's probably not a good idea. On account of the drugs.
So they found him after the wedding still dressed up in his feather boa and top hat passed out in a bush...
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
WHO CARES HE GIVES YOU TOE CURLING ORGASMS AND SAYS YOU HAVE KISSABLE SKIN AND RUNWAY MODEL HAIR....WHILE INTOXICATED WITH HIS BEST FRIEND. AND THEN HE SENDS YOU CUTE SELFIES OF THEM!!!!!!! WTF MORE DO YOU WANT FROM LIFE!!! DIE HAPPY ALREADY LADY!!!
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
Let's just say I peed the bed last night, and I wasn't in it alone. Whoooops
Randomize
